Troppo Tempo.

I have too much time on my hands.

How in the world can you have too much time on your hands in Italy, you say?

I've been having a much harder time adjusting than people realize, and than I expected to. It's very hard being completely alone in a country, and I'm not very close with the people in my program. Part of that is my fault, I need to make more of an effort but I feel very much like an outsider and it's hard to make the effort when you feel unwanted to begin with.

During the day things are fine. I'm busy with class and eating, and sometimes napping (it's so exhausting here), and a lot of the time shopping--but at night time when it's just me, I have too much time on my hands and I think too much. I miss my family and friends too much. At night time I miss America and the easy, comfortable feelings. And ice cubes. I miss ice cubes.

I've finally realized that I just need to keep myself busy. It's hard because the only thing people do in this program at night is go out, and I can't function in the mornings for class if I do. At least not every single time. Lara got in today and had a fiasco with lost luggage (thanks Air France. You suck). It was a really stressful day, but once all that has died down I think things will get better for me in the loneliness department. I need to start doing things at night more, even if it's just sitting in one of the piazzas talking or walking up the hill behind my house and looking at the city. I need to remember why the hell I'm here and stop my mind from running all day, and I've just got to make that happen.

Ciao,

Athena